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Family Life

Family Life

10 Ways To Communicate Effectively For A Stable Marriage.

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Meredith, 30, had been married to Ralph, 32, for more than six years. She was a stay-at-home wife and he was a top business executive. Ralph’s work has kept him so busy that he really thinks that he has no time to start a “family.” His frequent business travels have kept him away from home several days, and even weeks at a time. Like a typical workaholic, Ralph has made same mistake committed by many career-driven husbands — neglecting his wife. This situation has even made Meredith think that Ralph and really married to his career and not to her. Meredith and Ralph had been fighting more than ever before and it was pretty obvious that there was already a serious problem with their marriage. She accuses him of being cold and indifferent, and he accuses her of being a nagger. All their marital woes have caused them enormous stress and anxiety.

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Aside from financial trouble, infidelity, and problems with the in-laws, many marriages suffer from the simple lack of communication. Like Meredith and Ralph, many couples fail to resolve their problems early on. As a result, couples grow further apart and are left to struggle with their respective anger and frustration. Instead of speaking with each other as adults, many couples resort to withdrawal or the “silent treatment.” In many cases, couples have already formed the way they communicate based on how their own parents communicated with each other. A person who grew up with parents who constantly fight has the tendency to be argumentative too. A person who was raised by parents who ignored each other whenever they had problems may have the tendency to ignore his partner and his own problems in marriage.

It is said that it takes two to tango and it takes two to argue. But many marriages end up in separation or divorce precisely because the couple even evades quarrels and just chooses to ignore their problem. With mutual “silent treatment,” a couple denies their own opportunity to discuss and hopefully resolve their problem. And when they do talk, the couples would often just exchange accusations and even hurl invectives at one another.

Many women complain that men are so cold, indifferent, and insensitive to their needs and to the issues that affect their relationship. They say that men spend too much time at the office and neglect their duties as husband and father. Women feel angry when men go home only to spend time in front of the t.v. or go out to have drinking sprees with their friends. Men, on the other hand, complain that women are so boisterous, jealous, and nag all the time.

So, how can men and women in marriage deal with their marital problems? The first step that couples should take is to improve the way how they communicate with each other. Shown below are some of the ways how couples can improve their communication skills in marriage:

 

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Family LifeMental Health

Giftedness: How to Know If You Are Truly Exceptional

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Are you special? Are you unlike everybody else? If you want to know if you are truly unique, try answering the following questions.

1. Are the words your child use more advanced than those of other children his age?
2. Does he have the knack for answering logic-related problems with ease?
3. Can he memorize bulks of information just by skimming of a book?
4. In his leisure time, what does he usually do? Play with his toys or read books?
5. Does he easily get bored with the usual things that are being presented to him in school?
6. Does he observe a lot, think a lot, and ask questions more frequently than his playmates?
7. Whenever you limit the topics of his reading materials, does he usually complain about it?

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If all of your answers are yes, then you’re rearing a gifted child. This group of children is described to have higher intelligence than their usual age. Medical experts say that the children’s growth are described to be asynchronous – meaning that their mind, body, and emotion don’t develop at the normal rate. Gifted children are identified using a measuring tool that rates the Intelligence Quotient (IQ) of a child. The IQ Test classifies children according to their level of giftedness. The classifications are as follows: Bright, having 115 and above IQ average; Moderately gifted, 130 plus; Highly gifted, 145 plus; Exceptionally gifted, 160 plus; and Profoundly gifted 175 plus IQ average.

With their “giftedness,” these exceptional children have a sharp memory, linguistic flair, and high analytical capability. Still, their giftedness does not prevent them from experiencing stress and anxiety that is common in other children. A common dilemma among these children include performance anxiety — an overwhelming apprehension to fail or to perform in public. Their strong fear of not performing according to what is expected of them heightens their emotional scars and thus, causes disruption in their normal health and activities.

 

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Family Life

The Types And Effects Of Bullying You Should Know.

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Bullying is a form of harassment perpetrated by an abuser of more physical and/or social power and dominance than the victim. Bullying is done with clear intentions of causing harm to the target through verbal harassment, physical assault, emotional blackmail, or other more subtle methods of coercion such as manipulation.

Bullying exists in any setting where social interaction is present. This includes schools, workplaces, inside the home, and around the neighbourhood. This may even between different social groups, social classes and even between countries. Like any kind of abusive behavior, bullying is a repetitive act done to gain power or control over another person.

Generally, bullying is classified into 2 types:

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· Direct bullying. This includes physical aggression in the form of shoving and poking, throwing things, slapping, choking, punching and kicking, and beating.

· Indirect bullying. This is also called social aggression. This forces victims to go into social isolation. This is usually done by spreading gossip about the victim, refusing to socialize with the victim, name calling, mocking the victim, forcing other people to not socialize with the victim as well, and manipulation.

Why do bullies act the way they do? Some studies have shown that some bullies do it to be thought of as popular or tough, or to get attention. Bullies may also do it out of jealousy or may simply be acting out because they themselves were bullied. Some bullies are noted to have come from abusive families and neighbourhoods.

After-effects of bullying

Constantly being submitted to bullying may cause a person to develop inferiority complex. Inferiority complex, as the terminology implies, is a feeling of being inferior to others in one way or another. Always being mocked or negatively criticized by bullies may force a person to start believing the lies and second-guess themselves. Victims may also be more prone to developing stress related mental conditions such as anxiety and depression from frequently being bullied.

 

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Family LifeMental Health

Helping Children To Overcome Phobias.

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It is normal for children to sense fear about certain events or circumstances like being in a school play, passing a growling dog, or sleeping in the dark. But more often than not, these fears are exaggerated and even irrational. Some children can develop a very serious irrational fear that can be clinically considered as phobia. In medical terms, phobia refers to a type of anxiety disorder. It is a strong, irrational fear of something that poses little or no apparent danger. This is form of fear does not go away as easily as the more common types of fear like seeing a monster in a horror movie. If a child has a phobia, his or her sense of security and well-being is affected.

Most children normally go out of their way to avoid a seemingly scary situation or object. In case the situation or object of fear becomes unavoidable, children may experience panic and fear, rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, trembling, and a strong desire to get away from the thing or event that makes them scared. Sometimes, they already feel chest pains and dizziness once they entertain the thought that something bad or scary is about to happen. Losing control of the situation, kids who experience panic attacks because of their phobias would often fail to think straight and would even think that they are going crazy.

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Among the different types of phobias, the most commonly diagnosed form is called social phobia. This can make someone feel scared of being embarrassed in front of other people. Children can have this phobia and would be scared of talking to the teacher, or will get scared of walking into the front of the class for their show and tell. Children can also have phobias about spiders (arachnophobia), or fear of being in an enclosed space such as an elevator (claustrophobia), and even fear of taking a shower (ablutophobia).

There is still no solid research that details how and why children get phobias. Scientists claim that a person’s genes may have something to do with development of irrational fears. Traumatic events in a child’s life may do more to cause a phobia. Majority of people can be treated with regards to their phobias. Some may respond to treatment after a few months, while others may take a year or more.

 

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Family Life

5 Reasons Staying Together for The Kids Is A Very Bad Idea.

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Choosing if separation is the best answer for the problems you’re confronting in your marriage is never simple. Truth be told, it’s painful. You’ve put years into building a coexistence, and the possibility of starting again truly isn’t appealing. It’s quite unnerving! Be that as it may, you’re not happy. You know you merit satisfaction, so does your life partner. What’s more, your children deserve to be happy too.

That is the most concerning issue: Your children deserve happiness. What’s more, at this moment, your conviction is that they will never be glad in the event that you get separated. Many couples conclude that they can’t divorce because of their kids. They believe that their children should experience childhood in an intact family, and that anything less will destroy them.

These couples stay buried in their hopeless miserable unions, for the children. Lamentably, suffering for the children in this instance, is a truly terrible choice. On the off chance that you stick things out only for your children, you can hope to confront various issues.

Here are five reasons to reconsider staying together for the kids:

  1. Your children will discover that marriage is about separateness, not fellowship.

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By remaining together for their purpose, you’ll be showing them that marriage is about being hopeless and loathing your life partner. You’ll additionally demonstrate to them generally accepted methods to live separate lives and still be married.

  1. You and your life partner will keep on being lazy.

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Rather than putting in the truly diligent work to attempt to settle things or to separate deferentially, you can both simply take the path of least resistance and acknowledge your misery as a reality of your life. You’ll be picking mediocrity. By doing that, you are showing your children that is the thing that they can anticipate from life, as well.

  1. You’re living in fear.

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Divorce implies that you’ll need to live in an unexpected way. This could mean living on less pay, in another home, or getting a job outside of the home. However, one thing divorce completely means is that you’ll have less time with your children, since you and their other parent will be sharing time with them.

Yet, that is not the worst thing that can happen to you The thing is, your feelings of fear are generally a whole lot more terrible than reality.

 

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Family Life

6 Child Behavioral Problems That You Must Never Ignore as A Parent.

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It is true that all kids act mischievously, and a few children even develop some sort of transitory behavioral issues usually caused by stress.

Be that as it may, according to MedlinePlus, a kid’s acting up can indicate a significant issue on the off chance that their conduct is too hostile, forceful, or problematic and if the behavioral change lasts on for over 6 months. Another pointer that your tyke has behavioral issues, is the point at which the conduct is not fitting for their age.

Reading more about child psychology will help parents decide whether their kid’s behavior is ordinary or not. Other than that, watching out for these 6 child behavioral problems will help you decide if you ought to seek professional help.

  1. Poor Impulse Control

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Little children are generally imprudent and regularly have issues managing their feelings, which is quite typical. Be that as it may, rashness and failure to control outrage in older kids could demonstrate opposite defiant disorder.

About one in ten kids are accepted to have Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) which is portrayed by outrage, touchiness, hissy fits, and defiance.

In the event that you see this conduct in your youngster, make a point to look for assistance from a child therapist, or a doctor. The reasons for ODD are either mental in nature, or even neuro-organic as indicated by a few reviews.

 

  1. Inattention and Hyperactivity

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On the off chance that your kid demonstrates evident issues with attention, this could be an indication of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

ADHD is thought to happen in around 5 percent of kids on the planet and the reasons for this issue are not yet understood. However, analysts concur that the disorder is neurological in nature. ADHD is described by a powerlessness to hold consideration, issues with controlling one’s behavior, and social troubles.

With early treatment of this disorder, which include medication and therapy, kids with ADHD find it easier to focus, control their impulses. This will help them build up a sound confidence.

  1. Disrespect

A few children show disrespect towards their folks, other grown-ups, including peers. Lack of regard could either imply that your youngster is stating their autonomy or that they’re testing your limits. While being disrespectful is typical for a youngster, parents need to discourage such conduct and respond properly with a specific end goal to keeping this behavior from turning into a habit.

Contingent upon the child’s age and what they’re attempting to accomplish by being rude, a parent can do a few things. They can either completely ignore the child to discourage him/her from being disrespectful, stop it from developing in any way, or model what respectful conduct is. All things considered, kids learn best by example.

 

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Family LifeSex

How And When To Talk To Your Kids About Sex and Birth Control.

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It is perfectly normal for parents to have a hard time talking to their kids about sex and birth control. Properly and clearly discussing sexuality to children and teenagers is very important as this will certainly prevent unwanted and unexpected situations that can seriously affect the future of the children.

Even though discussing sexuality matters with youngsters is an essential task for parents, they still find it hard to open up or initiate the conversation with their children. Some are afraid that their teens might misinterpret the sensitive things they explain to their youngsters.

So, if you are one of those parents who do not know how to begin the conversation on sex and birth control with your young ones, read the following tips below for some helpful advice on such dilemma.

* Determine your own attitude regarding sex and birth control.

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It is proven that teens who can talk with adults regarding issues on sex are the ones whose parents are comfortable and are open about the subject. When kids are exposed in such environment, they are less likely to be engaged in pre-marital sex and unwanted pregnancy.

As such, being comfortable with sex is important for you to be able to discuss the matter with your teenagers. If you are uncomfortable with sex and the use of birth control, try to discuss first your beliefs and feelings with your spouse, close friend, or with a physician. This way, you will be able to feel more confident on discussing sexuality matters with your teens.

* Begin discussing sexuality matters with your teenagers as early as possible.

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It is best to try discussing sexuality matters with your young ones as early as possible in order for you to have an easier time explaining even more serious and complicated matters with them in the future. Begin when your child is in his or her early adolescent age. Take advantage of situations when you can best discuss sexuality and birth control use with your kids.

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Emotion ManagementFamily Life

Easy Way To Effectively Identify Inferiority Complex In Children.

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Whether you’re fat or thin, black or white, yellow or brown, big or small — somehow, in some little way — you might have had thoughts of inferiority. The self-defeating attitude of comparing ourselves with others…the little negative things we tell ourselves only serve to put our own self-image in a bad light. We sometimes tell ourselves that we are not good enough, pretty enough, or smart enough. And when this sense of “being less in value compared to others” controls our behavior, it can already be considered an inferiority complex.

An “inferiority complex” or extremely low self esteem is a concept we are all familiar with. Chances are, we know someone or even we ourselves suffer from this complex. People with low self-esteem are more likely to be irritable or aggressive. They may also be more likely to have feelings of resentment, alienation, and suffer depression.

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An inferiority complex, in the fields of psychology and psychoanalysis, is a feeling that one is inferior to others in some way. It is often unconscious, and is thought to drive afflicted individuals to overcompensate, resulting either in spectacular achievement or extreme antisocial behavior. It is a fomr of psychological and emotional disability that adversely affects a person’s well-being.

The subconscious mind of a man still carries the same feelings of being weak compared to others and that’s why he felt worthless compared to others. The man labeled himself with labels like being weak, inadequate, stupid, or clumsy.

These labels accompanied him everywhere and although they were buried deep into his subconscious mind, they took control of his behavior and feelings. He tried to convince himself that he is fine now and that he doesn’t have a reason to feel inferior again but this never worked, his subconscious mind needs much more than this in order to stop making him feel inferior.

Usually rejection by family and friends, or exceedingly high expectations is often the root cause of an inferiority complex. A man’s view of himself is based on the things he or she is being told, the specific situations that a man is experiencing, and the way he or she is treated. Inferiority complex is deeply rooted in the man’s childhood.

 

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